So, I might have to change churches...

People say the darndest things to me...

Tonight at dinner, a much older woman actually leaned over me while I was sitting at Wednesday night dinner & she started rubbing my belly with both hands. I couldn't back up b/c she is leaning over me with her head nuzzled at my neck. Then, she starts scratching, then patting my belly. It was all I could take. I was trapped!

I walk in to drop Charlie off at his class, and his teacher says, "My you are getting big". I assume (incorrectly) that she is talking to Charlie, and I say something about how big he is, etc. and she says, "No, YOU are getting big.... Can I touch your belly?" What does one say to that? She asked, so can I say, "No"?

Walking down the hallway, a much older man says "You sure are about to split open".

Followed by another man, "You are about to pop".

My personal favorite is by a friend's 5 year old boy who said, "You look like if you eat one more meal, you will explode!"

Only 3.5 weeks to go....They better get their comments in while they can!

Shhhh...don't tell Geoff, but I actually like being pregnant!

Now that I don't throw up every time I eat, see, smell, or think about food, being pregnant is actually kind of fun!

• People are really nice to pregnant women. I haven't waited in line for anything in weeks! Strangers smile when they look at my belly & start talking to me about the joys of having children. I haven't had to carry a thing or bend over & pick anything up. Someone comes along and offers to do it for me! It's fantastic!
• I love, love, love feeling my baby move!
• I love it when my boys want to kiss the baby in my tummy
• I don't have to worry about what I'm going to wear every day. I only have a limited selection to choose from each morning & this makes my life considerably easier! And, I don't worry about when I wore it last....who cares? I'm pregnant!
• If I ever mention that I'm in the mood for something specific to eat, Geoff usually makes it happen! If he is at practice, my mom does!
• I eat ALL the time. And, I don't care. I've got to lose all the weight in a few weeks anyways, might as well make it worth it!
• I don't have to worry about how I look in a swim suit...surely everyone can tell I'm pregnant!

I mean, I don't want to go crazy & have like 10 kids, but I'm definitely feeling blessed today that God lets me have babies! Baby Cannon 3 should be here 5 weeks from tomorrow!

Seriously?

I think that men at church feel more comfortable than they should talking to me because we're good friends, and we all see each other all the time. This is an actual conversation that happened this morning between me & my Sunday school teacher, who we love, he just says goofy things. (My thoughts in blue)

Him: "Wow", (ut oh) "you are really getting pregnant" ( Getting pregnant? I've been pregnant for months now, but o.k., I'll let it slide)

Me: "What? Do you think this shirt makes me look pregnant"? (dripping with sarcasm & an attempt at humor, so that maybe he would get that I didn't want to go down this line of conversation)

Him: "No, I think it's your belly that makes you look pregnant" (Really? You think?)

A very nice bystander: "I think she just looks pregnant from the side". (Aw, thank you for trying to save him from himself)

Him: "No, I can tell from the front." (Can't you see we are all trying to help you stop talking! Please excuse yourself & go find your seat! :)

Let's get the word out...

It is not o.k. for men to touch the bellies of pregnant women! (Unless, of course, you are married to them)

I actually had a man rub my belly with TWO hands the other day! Yes, 2 hands! Very awkward!

Pregnant is the new skinny.

I read that on a shirt & loved it!!

O.k., so I don't understand why men talk to pregnant women. They almost always say something inappropriate. It is never funny to joke with a pregnant woman about how much she is eating. Never. Ever. Please, write that down, share it with men you know.

Here are some other true, just from this week, examples:

-Any time a guy looks at me, & starts his sentence with "Whoa..." I know whatever else he says is going to be stupid. There are too many of these to list.

-There was a guy at church who was laughing at me as I passed him the offering plate, I asked him what was funny, and he pointed to my belly. I didn't get it, so I said jokingly, "Is that a fat joke?". He said, "not yet". (Still don't get it, but am pretty sure I would be offended if I did)

-Another man at chuch holds his back & waddles when he sees me. I'm not sure why, as I do not waddle in 3 inch heels, but whatever. His wife has been pregnant 3 times, so surely he knows you can't joke with pregnant women. (unless you are married to them, even then...it's risky)

-My sweet dad, and if you know him, you know that he is always putting his foot in his mouth, asks me at the pool, "Do you find that you have more "float" now?" Uh, no dad....my belly has a baby in it...not a big pocket of air.

-And my favorite: I was talking to a couple who are both in their late 60's, and she comments that she didn't know I was pregnant, don't I know how that happens, etc, etc. I politely laughed, and her husband actually said, "Well, I, for one, am just glad you guys are still doing it!" I'm pretty sure I blacked out.

Let the comments begin...

I know, I know. It must be hard to think of things to say to pregnant women. It's like when people see women who are pregnant, their mind actually stops processing intelligent things to say.

I was telling the lady who helps my grandmother that we were expecting our 3rd child. She looks at me, and says, "Well, I hope you are going to get fixed after this!" Fixed?!? Like a dog? Am I broken? Is me having 3 kids too much for you?

And, why do people say, "Don't you know what causes that?". Do they really want me to answer?